To The One My Heart Grew Heavy For

I miss you terribly and I wish you’d come back home to me. I know it’s a selfish thing, wishing you were here while you need your time and space, but I can’t help wanting to be wrapped up safely in your arms. You were my rock, my safety net, and now you’re gone; you’ve disappeared and I don’t know if you’ll be coming back. My mind is full of words I never had the courage to share with you, and now I’m left regretting every unspoken syllable. I should have been more open with you because now, when I no longer have the opportunity, I want to rip my heart wide open and let its love pour over you. I need you, I need you here, and not because I can’t image a life without you; but because, now that I’ve had the chance to swim inside your soul, no other waters seem so appealing.

I want to run to you and hold you in my arms. I want to feel the rhythm of your heart beating against my chest. I want to hear your voice echoing your declarations of love for me. But I can’t bring myself to call out to you.

Your head has been hectic, your mind a mess, and I know you need time to sort it all out. And yes, I miss you, but above all I am so concerned for your well-being. You told me you were falling apart, and I’ve never felt so worried. I want to hold your hand and help you through this. I want you to know that I’m on your side. I’m doing all I can to keep myself from calling out to you. I desperately want to make sure that you’re safe, that you’re doing well tonight. But you asked for time and I want to respect your space.

I love you. And my heart is so damn heavy for you. Take your time and take care of yourself. But know in your heart I’m always here, waiting with open arms.

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